Man, where are all the ute fans?? I will start the smut fest :evil:
What's the difference between BYU fans and a litter of puppies? Eventually, the litter of puppies grows up and stops whining.
What do you call an intelligent person in Cougar Stadium? A visitor.
As two BYU grads walked through the countryside, they noticed some tracks. The first asked, ``Deer tracks?'' The second replied, ``No, bear tracks.'' However, the conversation ended abruptly when a train hit them.
Two BYU students decide they want to try ice fishing.
They go and buy all the necessary equipment and load up their pickup.
In the process, the students realize they don't know where to go to try out this new sport.
Finally, after about three hours of intense brainstorming, one student thinks of the perfect spot.
They drive to the spot, unload their equipment and make their way onto the ice in search for the perfect location. They cut a hole in the ice and begin to fish.
About three minutes pass when out of nowhere a booming voice is heard: ``THERE ARE NO FISH BENEATH THE ICE!''
Completely confused and scared, the two students stop and look around but see no one.
"Did you hear that?'' ask one student. "Yea. Who was it?'' responded the second student.
Confused but determined, both students continue to fish.
A minute passes, and they hear again: ``THERE ARE NO FISH BENEATH THE ICE!''
Dazed and frightened, one BYU student stands up, looks to the heavens and asks ``Is that you, God? Are you trying to help us?''
The voice responds ``No, you idiot, it's the ice rink manager. Now get off our ice!''
A BYU co-ed and a Utah co-ed enter the ladies room at last years football game. They both enter their stall and do their business. Simultaneously, they flush and exit the stalls. The BYU co-ed heads for for the sink while the Utah coed heads striaght for the door. In disbelief the BYU co-ed shouts after her: "At BYU they teach us to wash our hands!", to which the Utah co-ed replies: "At the U they teach us not to pee on our hands."
What do you call a 300 pound BYU coed?
What is the difference between a BYU Co-ed heading to the cafeteria and a speeding bullet?
Superman can stop the speeding bullet.
Did you hear about the new BYU Coed Doll?
You put a ring on her finger and she inflates.
A BYU Coed had car trouble out on I-15. After a few minutes of attempting to flag down another car to help she decided to hike up her skirt a bit and show some thigh. Of course this did not help at all so next she decided to take of her shirt and jump up and down waiving her arms. After several minutes and still not being able to get someone to stop, she removed all of her clothing and and stood next to her car in the most sexy mannor that a BYU Coed could come up with. About that time a group of Hells Angels came by, immediatly stopped, grabbed the coed, took her down into some bushes and gang-dressed her
How do you get a BYU coed into your car?
Show her a diamond ring.
How do you get her out again?
Tell her that you're a non-member.
Q: What do you call 7 guys in a room tag-teaming a drunk 17 year old girl?
A: The byu offensive line...
Q: 3 byu football players are riding in a car. Who is driving?
A: A Police Officer.
This ones for everybody
Q. How do you tell the difference between a BYU coed and a U. of U. coed?
A. The BYU coed is looking for a husband. The U. coed is looking for the father.
LaHurl had been attending BYU for 6 years without going on a mission and still did not have enough credits to graduate.
At the commencement ceremony with almost the entire student body assembled a chant broke out: ``Let LaHurl graduate, Let LaHurl graduate!''
The university president, realizing he had a potential riot on his hands and being depressed at the thought of having LaHurl return for another year, calmed the crowd by announcing that if LaHurl would come up and answer a one-question exam, he would give LaHurl a diploma.
LaHurl jumped up on the stage and the president said, ``You have one chance, LaHurl, What is 9 times 9''? LaHurl beamed and blurted out 81.
A stunned silence followed. Then a murmur. Then one cry, then another, soon the whole throng was chanting, ``Give him another chance! Give him another chance!''
Q: What do you get when you crossbreed byu football and a groundhog?
A: Six more weeks of bad football!
A byu fan calls a local sports talk radio show:
"I just don't think the BYU offense will be able to stop the Utah defense."
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